How to Not Get Friendzoned by a Girl

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From the desk of Harsh Strongman
Subj: How to Avoid The Friend Zone

The answer to avoiding the friendzone is simple – you have to act like a man, not like a friend or “nice guy”.

Women will respond to you being a man – flirty, sexual, touchy, excited, strong, passionate, etc. and they will respond like women – they’ll respond with either sexual attraction or they’ll say no.

What most guys do wrong is that they try to hide the fact that they are men and they have penises.

They act like over-socialized friendly dorks with no penis because they’re too afraid of being men.

Do not be afraid of being a man with a penis.

Look, why are you out with her? It is for the company or because you want sexual things to happen?

If it’s the latter, she must understand that’s what you (and she) is there for.

No, this doesn’t mean you are autistic and say dumb things like “I am here to fuck you”.

You need to let your intentions be known in a suave way.

Say “You look good, I like you. I want to go out with you.”

Ask her for a date.

The date can be anything you like and enjoy – a dinner, a game of badminton, etc. Anything private, low effort, physical (ie. not a zoom meeting), and something FUN. She must have fun when she’s around you.

(Life advice: Never bore a woman. Love them, hate them, make them laugh, make them cry – anything but bore them.)

You are out on a date. She likes you – be a man. Don’t act too smooth and modern. Be rough and yourself.


Don’t be creepy, but touch her casually (for example, on her arm). Look into her eyes. Smirk.

Flirt with her. Tease her playfully.

Hold her hand when walking. (Not on the first date)

Tell her she looks hot in that dress (she wore it for you).

Put your hand around her shoulder and play with her hair.

Grab her by her hand and lead her to where you want to go.

If she’s into you then she’ll respond positively. If she’s not into you, she’ll take your hand off.

Both are good outcomes. If she’s interested, then she’s interested. If she’s not, then she’s not. You never get friendzoned.

Don’t try to hide the fact that you are a man by repressing your sexuality. God made you a sexual creature, so act like one.

If she talks about other men, you talk about other girls and be sexually graphic. It must be clear that you’re a guy who gets a lot of girls and are thus high value (this is how women’s minds work. If other girls want you, you are automatically high value).

If she says “we’ll make good friends”, you say “I don’t want to be your friend, I want to go out with you”.

Don’t try to hide. Open yourself to being rejected. It is OK to be rejected. It is not ok to be strung along like the average chump.

If things go well and if you like her, then kiss her and see where it goes.

Most men think they can scam a girl into liking them. They act like a “friend” around her hoping that she’ll think “he’s different” and sleep with him.

Men get friendzoned because they act like a friend. They act like they have no penis so this is how the girl acts too.

Look, if you don’t act sexually interested in her and choose to behave as friends, then you are putting yourself in the friendzone.

When you are clear that you do not intend to be a friend, you get accepted or rejected. You do not get used like an emotional tampon.

A lot of this comes down to you valuing yourself and your time.

The average man has no self-respect and will get strung along burning his time and money on her as a male-friend-aka-boyfriend-she-doesn’t-sleep-with for months and years.

Have some self-respect. You’re a man and you’re into her sexually. She can either take it or leave it, but there is no in the middle “male-friend-emotional-but-not-sexual” option.

Do the opposite. Go out with multiple women – sexual but not emotional.

Learn from life that women are everywhere, and there are far more beautiful women than there are successful men.

When you go out with many women, you have OPTIONS, and when you have options, you are NOT DESPERATE.

When you are not desperate, you are immediately a much higher value guy because it signals that other women must clearly want you (or why aren’t you falling apart all over her like most guys).

Not being desperate doesn’t mean repressing your sexuality and being a nice guy – it means being indifferent to the outcome of the date. You are sexual but you are not emotionally invested.

You are high value and sought after by other girls so you don’t need to press too much about this one girl.

Speaking of value – raise your value. Do some self-improvement. Lose the fat, gain some muscle.

Be someone that men want to know and many women want to sleep with. Well dressed, rich, and manly.

The higher your value, the less social rules apply and the more crude and upfront you can be without problems.

If you are a high value man, you can even say things like “I like your sister. I should date her instead.” to a girl you’re dating. She’ll just chalk it off as men being men. If you are low value, you have to “follow the social rules” and you can’t say things like that.

The bottom line is – most of your problems with women will be solved by you acting like a man. I don’t mean you need to be smooth and internet alpha, but just a man with high testosterone – strong, sexual, and clear about what he wants (to be a lover not a friend).

Most girl problems come from a lack of masculinity, and the solution is also very simple – be a man and don’t be afraid to show it. There is no other good way to live.

Hope this helps.

Harsh Strongman

P.S. If you’re already in the friendzone with some girl, don’t waste more time trying to come out of it. The damage is already done. Just find a new chick and move on. Plenty of women out there and life is too short.

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