From the desk of Harsh Strongman
Subj: What I wish I had told my friend before he committed suicide
Two weeks ago, a good friend of mine and the man who taught me everything about SEO Jon Anthony (author of Masculine Development) committed suicide.
Jon was not the “sad and depressed” stereotype that people assume leads to suicide.
Jon was successful, fit, got laid a lot, and was making a lot of money.
I know he was making close to $100k per month from his blog and SEO agency combined.
I spoke with him often and I had 0 hint that he was going to do something like this.
Some people are very good at hiding misery, trauma, and sadness.
While it is futile to discuss Jon’s personal life or why he made such a drastic step, I did want to discuss a few things with all of you.
1. Do not be afraid to reach out
If you are feeling sad, alone, or overwhelmed – do not be afraid to reach out to your friends and family.
More people care about you than you think.
Call your mother, father, brother, sister, close friends, family – they care about you and want to speak with you.
Do not be afraid to reach out and tell them that you’re not doing well.
You are not alone.
2. Make sure your friends and family are doing OK
Call your friends and family. Ask them if they are doing ok.
Go out and get some dinner with them once in a while.
You will be surprised how many people seem to be doing OK but aren’t actually doing well.
Just because someone looks like the are doing well does not mean they are actually doing well. Many people are very good at hiding their traumas.
Jon was making a lot of money (close to 6 figures a month), getting laid regularly, and had a physique better than 99% of humanity. From the outside, everything is going so well for him.
And yet here we are.
If I had called him up and asked him “Hey brother, are you doing ok? Is everything fine? You can talk to me” then maybe, just maybe, he would still be alive.
3. Be less stressed. Things take time.
This one doesn’t apply to people younger than 25 because your body handles stress really well, but if you are older – learn to manage stress levels.
Get everything done but don’t get overwhelmed. Rome wasn’t built in a day.
Take your time. Breathe.
Sweat. Sweating is so good for you.
Stress is a silent killer. It destroys your body from the inside.
Meditate. Sleep well. Set achievable goals. Let things take their course of time.
4. Family Matters More Than Money
Family matters more than money because if you make WiFi money, you will eventually make more money than you know what to do with.
What good is having a lot of money if you don’t have children to spend it on?
What good is money at 35 when you are done with “traveling”?
After a certain point, money doesn’t actually do much for you. There’s only so much you can spend.
Humans did not evolve solely to collect resources. We evolved to mate and reproduce.
Jon was making more than $1M per year. He had no wife or children. He lived alone and got overwhelmed with the stress of life.
Marry a good woman of religion and culture and have children. It is the most important thing you will ever do, far more important than making money and “hoes” (although both of these are important in their own respects).
I think if he took things a little easier after he hit his number and had some children – he would still be here with us.
I don’t mean to insult Jon’s memory – he was my friend.
I’m just telling you what I think is a fact. We must learn from other people’s mistakes so that we do not repeat them.
5. Don’t Move The Goalpost
I’m telling you, after a certain point – money doesn’t actually matter.
I used to think I’ll have enough when I have $1M.
Then when I had $1M, I changed the definition of “enough” to $2M.
Then $3M.
Then $5M.
Then more and more.
With the 150% rise in Bitcoin prices in the last year, I more than doubled my net worth again.
My instinct is to move the goalpost again.
It never ends.
You have to decide your number and stick to it.
Once you hit your number, it’s time you focus more on family, children, etc. than on work. Of course you still work, but you work as much as you want to – no more 16 hour days.
Note: You need to consciously avoid lifestyle inflation. Otherwise you WILL go broke.
6. Call Your Mother
Seriously. She wants to talk to you. When was the last time you spoke?
Let’s do some math.
Let’s say you live alone and you are 25. Your mother is 50.
How often do you visit her? Twice a year?
How many more years do you think she is going to live? Let’s say she lives until she’s 80.
That’s only 60 more times you’re going to meet her.
That’s not a lot. Call your mother and father.
Speak to them often. They miss you.
They just don’t tell you because they don’t want to burden you.
– Harsh Strongman
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